Waiting for marriage

The other thing I wanted to write about tonight was that I so wish I was dating someone. I don't really have a best friend, I have good friends, but I would really love a best friend. A best guy friend. I crave that. And I'm sick of guys like Isaac flirting with and teasing me, but teasing me like we are in elementary, but making me enjoy and look forward to his attention nonetheless, and then him not doing anything. I'm sick of guys not doing anything. I know I've said that before and I know that that is probably an unfair generalization, but I'm just in a lonely, frustrated mood tonight, since Institute. I am so ready to be done with the single life some days, and today is one of those.

A lot of what we talked about tonight in Institute was the act of waiting, and different things we wait for at this time in our life. Marriage was definitely the first thing mentioned, and man, do I fall under that category. I used to be afraid of marriage, and felt very un-ready, but I feel much more prepared than even just a year ago, and actually really want it now. But waiting for it, this I must keep doing. I know that it will happen when it is supposed to happen, and that I need to just appreciate and love life for where I'm at in it, and I do a lot of the time, but a lot of the time I also would love to be done with the single life and the dating game, and just hang out with my best friend, and feel loved and wanted and cared about, and even more, to have someone to love and want and care so much about. I just got done with my marriage prep class tonight, and it has been the greatest class! I have absolutely loved it. Dr. Carroll is such a fantastic teacher, very insightful and experienced. And I feel SO much more prepared for marriage, and relationships in general even. But going to that class and talking about dating and marriage so much has definitely increased my desire for those things, which is good, but doesn't make waiting for them to happen any easier...