3rd date with Brian U.

So he came and got me at 4 pm, and we headed to Provo. We were going to the BYU vs U women's soccer game, and when we got down there to buy tickets before doing anything else, they only had general admission seats left, and standing room only they said, but we got them anyway, and went to get some dinner. Went to J-Dawgs, met up with a friend of Brian's there, who was actually one of his EFY kids years ago (the kid is 25 now, and I asked Brian if that makes him feel old, and he was like yeah..haha), then went back to the field to the game. Great game! BYU won 2-0, and we did end up standing all but the last 10 min, but it was still fun! My mission friend, Haley Elmer, has two sisters that play for the U, and they are so good! Their dad was there, and I saw him and said hi and introduced myself. I recognize him from FB pics, haha. Haley wasn't there though, I texted her.

Anyway, after the game we went to the Creamery for ice cream, of course. And Heritage is completely non-existent! It's crazy how different things are down there! The dorms don't even look like BYU anymore, it's crazy! The buildings are so tall and nice-looking! Creamery's still the same though.:)

Then we went to the dollar theater down there, Movies 8, and saw Cokeville Miracle, and it was SO good. Such an incredible true story. I totally cried at the end, it was a very moving ending! I thought he was crying too, which made me feel better, haha, but after he said he was surprised that he didn't. Heartless... haha, jk.

Then we drove back to SLC.

It was a fun night, with some positives and some negatives. Positives: on second look at his hands, his hands are actually fine. I like them. So that was nice to cross off my negatives list. And speaking of hands, can I just say I love the watch he's always wearing?? He wears this cool white sports watch, I love it! Also on the positives, I feel myself finding him a little more attractive. He almost always opens the car door for me, always opens building doors for me, and I just felt watched out for in little ways, like when we were walking back to the car after the game, and he pulled me by my purse strap out of the road. I thought it was cute. Also, his shoes. Dang, they were great. So far he is three for three on good shoes! He was wearing these awesome white and multicolored nikes, they were rad! I commented on them, of course. So at least he's got the good and attractive footwear down.

For the negatives, there were two. First, he was not in fact wearing any cologne. Again. FAIL. So disappointing. If only guys knew what a difference that makes! And while I haven't smelled any cologne ever, I also haven't smelled any stink on him ever either, so at least he doesn't stink. And then the other thing is that besides that first date we went on, the movie at the park, where he was so uberly impressive in every way, including asking me about me and being great at conversation, he really doesn't ask me about me. We mostly talk about him. I know all about his multiple jobs, some past and then present ones, but he's never really asked me much about my work. And I love my job, it's so much of who I am and what I do. I love to talk about it, if someone wants to know. But yeah, I try to ask him more get to know you questions, and sometimes he'll ask me them back, but he's just not been great at getting to know me specifically. I don't love that. Oh, and then the other thing is sense of humor. I'm not sure we have the same sense of humor. Which is a major bummer, because that's a big deal to me. We don't laugh together a ton. And in general, I like to laugh a LOT. Life is funny, if you can't laugh about it, it's just not as fun. Or you cry instead. Ha. But yeah, so still some getting to know each other, but he seems to like being with me, and I like being with hiim, so we'll see. Slowly.

And no, he didn't put any moves on me, at the movie or anytime. I didn't want to kiss him last night, partly because I have a strict no kissing on the first three dates rule, but also I don't want that yet. But I would have welcomed any hand holding at the movie, and I thought he maybe wanted to, from where his hand was positioned at times, but never happened. Which is totally fine. I'm all about moving slow, I think it's the best, most natural way for a relationship to progress, and yields the best results in the end. And I'm a little annoyed that he doesn't seem to want to know more about me right now. So it's good nothing happened.

Anyway, got to get ready for work! Also, best part of this day, the AMAZING WIN BYU JUST PULLED OFF AGAINST NEBRASKA!!! It was crazy!! 1 second left and they made this incredible touch down...amazing!!!!!

Can't sleep

I was so tired earlier..especially at Institute tonight, I was so excited to go to bed, and now my mind has been racing, and I can't get my body to feel sleepy..these nights make me crazy. Especially when I was SO sleepy earlier..

I've been thinking a lot about Andy tonight, and the last few days. Yes, that Andy, Andy Heaton, who I dated off and on for like 6 months or something.. I've been missing him and thinking a lot about him suddenly, to the point where I've wondered if there is a significant reason why. Like maybe I'm going to hear from him soon or something, or maybe he's thinking of me..? I don't know. But I will say, I do miss him, and I would actually love to date him again. I would love to give us another chance. My only real thing with him is his height (and how hard he kissed me, how he kind of sucked my lips a little harder than I liked and they would get all puffy and red and I was embarrassed, haha..but I figure we could work on that..). But other than that, I think he's pretty attractive, and some things I've recently realized that I kind of took for granted with him and that were major positives were that he always smelled so good (this is huge, and so desirable), and he was so fun to talk to! He thought I was funny, I thought he was, he was so fun to text with and joke with, especially like when we were kissing. I could really make him laugh then. Haha. I miss that. I also loved his hands. I LOVED those hands. I look at guys hands, and he had nice, manyly, but soft hands. And nice fingernails. I don't know why that's a thing for me, but it is. Teeth, shoes, and hands. But in contrast, this Brian guy seems like a great guy still, we went out for the second time the other night, I think I wrote about it, but I just don't know how physically attracted I am, and he hasn't smelled good yet. That may seem small, but I really like a guy that smells good. It's kind of a big deal. And I know that's something you can change, so it's not a deal breaker, but any guy is significantly more attractive when he smells good, regardless of what he looks like. Just sayin. And I'm not sure about Brian's teeth, I think they're pretty good..hard to tell, I haven't seen them much yet. And his hands are..fine.. I just really liked Andy's. Aa, why am I thinking so much about him?? It's still pointless, right? I mean, I was over him for a while, never thought about him like this. Why now? And why so much? Like he's an option...

I've also suddenly been thinking about Dylan tonight, as I lay awake here. I miss that sweet boy. I was even completely in tears, thinking about his funeral, and Rosanna, and how she must just ache all the time for him. I don't know how she does it. I wish we had him here still. I was thinking about our Texas beach family vacation a few years ago, and cute Dylan hanging out of the circular holes in the stairway wall with his yellow blankie. So cute.

But anyway, Andy. Yeah. I just..I would love it if he was thinking about me. And I would love to see him. I would love to be with him again, and date him. I feel like things could possibly really work out. But I don't feel like I'm supposed to message him or anything. 

I would love to see him. I even, a few days ago when I first started thinking about him a lot, I even felt this giddiness about him, like I was going to see him, it was weird. Definitely haven't seen him, and I'm pretty sure he's not in Utah, but....that would be awesome. If I suddenly got a text or a call from him saying he was in Utah and could he see me. I would love that.

Alright, I'm getting tired again. Back to bed it is.