Jamie Jamie Jamie

How I absolutely love Jamie. She is my best friend. I have never had a better friend than her, I don't think. The only friends that come close in comparison to my best friend-ness with her are Cheryl, back before my mission, when we lived together, and then Tisah, after my mission, when we spent a ton of time together. But I really haven't had a friend quite like Jamie. She is amazing. So so thoughtful, all the time, so considerate, so nice. And she just loves me, which I don't say easily. And she lets me know it all the time, sends me such nice texts all the time, or tells me in person, and because of it, I tell her too. We just love each other.:) But I feel so so blessed to have her as a friend.
We see and/or text each other pretty much every day. She is one who I really don't really get sick of. There have been times when we've spent so much time together doing fun things that I need my alone time, but other than that, she is one who I can hang out with for hours on end, day after day, and I really don't get sick of. Like our times going to Seven Peaks together this summer, just the two of us, and we both talked about how it was still so fun, even though it was just us, and that it's amazing that we don't get sick of each other. We have also talked about how (well, I've mentioned, and she seemed to agree) that too bad one of us isn't a boy.
But on that note, and I mentioned this to her the other night, that we just need to find male versions of each other, and we'll be set.
But in all seriousness, I decided last night that when I find a guy that I like being with more than Jamie, then maybe that's when I'll know I've found the right one.
I just love her, she is so great. And she is so good to me, so supportive, she was probably my biggest support through the whole NCLEX stress and test, wants to be the first to celebrate with me, she is always there for me.
I used to get really sad when I would think of her dating someone, or getting married, and leaving me in the dust. That was a really hard thought, especially at times when I really thought it could be imminent. But now, I will be sincerely happy for her. And I pray that she gets married before me. Mostly because, well, I want that for her so bad, because she wants it so so badly. Oh, so bad. It's so hard to see her not be able to find a husband when she just wants to be a wife and mom so bad.
But also because I think I will be more okay without her than she will be without me. And I don't mean that in a rude way at all. But I think she is a little more in need of someone, and I am that someone for her right now. She is so good at being thoughtful and affectionate, and I think she needs someone to be that way for. I also am a little better at being happy and having fun despite my singularity as well. And I really can't judge her, because she's been out of school and just working for so long. I've been blessed to be distracted by school for so long that it hasn't been as much of an issue, that I'm not dating or married. Some days are harder than others, but for the most part, I love life anyway. Jamie has a little bit harder time with it. And for those reasons which are understandable. But she focuses on the issue and talks about it so much, it kind of worries me. Doesn't worry me, but I wish I could help her not focus on it so much. Partly because it seems like that's when things happen, when people are busy doing other things in life.
I don't want that to sound like I am talking negatively about her at all. I love Jamie to death. She is my best friend. It's just hard to see her sad, even when she tries to cover it. I can usually tell when something is wrong or hard for her. And if I got married first, that would be really hard for her, I know, and would about kill me because I would know how hard that would be for her, and she would pretend that she was okay anyway. Because she's amazing. So I do, I pray nearly every day that she--and Wendy as well--finds a great guy to date and marry before I do.