JFK Josh

So this Sabbath afternoon I went on a 3rd/4th date with the JFK Josh guy I met online. I say 3rd/4th because last night was supposed to be our 3rd date, but after about 5 min, he got called to search and rescue, so he turned around and took me home. He felt really bad, but it was no big deal. It was fun to see him, even just for a few minutes, and it was cool to see him in that situation, in his element, and to see his reaction. Plus, I was able to get more homework done, which was good.

In the car, after he got the page, he was like, "How's your Monday?" :) It was cute. So I said yeah, we could do something Monday. But then today he texted me after I got home from visiting and asked how my Sunday was, and then we were texting and he asked me what kind of things I like to do on Sundays. He asked about outdoors things, and I said it depends, what did you have in mind? And he said, "I don't know, a short hike or something." And I didn't love the idea of hiking on Sunday, I didn't know what a short hike entailed, but I decided to play it safe and said, "hm..not a big Sunday hiker, but maybe a walk or something a little more low key.." To which he suggested a walk around Sugarhouse park. To which I said sure.:)

So he came and got me about 20 minutes later and we headed to the park, walked around it twice, and went home. :)

It was fine, we talked a lot about search and rescue, and about last night and how everything went.
The whole SandR thing is so fascinating to me, I love hearing him talk about it! We talked about other things too, I learned his dad died a few years ago, while he was on his mission, from throat cancer (among other things). Sad. But he seems fine about it, said his dad had been sick for a long time.

We also talked about family, and our different family businesses we grew up in (Los, and his family's apt complex businesses). After about once around the park, I could now tell that I wasn't super interested in him, romantically. I thought maybe something could happen, but yeah, not so much. He's a really great guy, treats me really well, has a great job, is very nice, and he makes me feel so attractive and desirable, which is so nice because it's been so long since a guy has made me feel that way! But I just don't feel really any chemistry when I'm with him. I feel more chemistry when texting him than when I'm actually with him, ha.

His kind of know-it-all attitude about nursing kind of came out again today, like in that email response a couple months ago that made me so irritated that I decided I was done with him, until I had Elisa read it and tell me to give him another chance. Yeah, I told him my mom is a nurse, but is actually going back to school to get her bachelor's. And that brought up why, and he had this response like, "I don't buy it." I almost slugged him, in kind of a flirtatious/joking way, but didn't, but said, "What do you know?" I was kind of irritated. He said (reminded me) that his sister is a nurse (which, to me, doesn't mean squat), and that since my mom had so much experience, it shouldn't matter. I told him I agreed, it shouldn't, but for some reason (which I told him I think is the increasing competition in the nursing job market) it seems to matter more now, that RN's have a bachelor's degree. He still was in disagreement, and I didn't want to argue about it, so I just said, "And she just feels like she should." That satisfied him. But man, not super attractive, that wasn't.

Anyway, I don't think he is the one, and I came home kind of stressed about having to actually have a talk with him soon telling him I'm not interested or what not. And we have come far enough that the talk is going to be awkward and I'm going to inevitably feel bad after and question what I've done. We're going out on Tuesday, in place of Monday (I thought today was in place of Monday, but nope:) ), I already said Tues would work, so we'll see how that goes. I was thinking I might tell him after that. But then Sally called tonight and I was telling her, and Joe, all about it all, and they both said to just keep dating him. Unless I really have a strong reason not to go out with him, or if he proposes or something, and I'm not feeling the same way, to just keep going out with him as long as he keeps asking. So I guess I will. And they had a good point, that it's good for both of us, we're both learning more as we go. Which is true. So I'll keep saying yes I suppose.

I would love to just be friends and be able to keep hearing about his search and rescue stuff, it is so cool! So if and when I end things, that will be a bummer to not hear anymore about, ha. But seriously.