But in a quick summary, life it really good. This whole semester it has been. Some highlights of recent include going on dates THREE WEEKENDS IN A ROW! It's been so unexpected, and so fun! I went on 2 dates 2 weekends ago (which I wrote about), and then one with Brett Goodman (Elder Goodman, served in Cookeville around him) last weekend, and then I got "Date Box-ed" this past weekend and ended up going with Granger in the ward, on a Date Box group date to the Burgess's house in Alpine, where we ate amazing dinner and played games and chatted/told stories. It was a lot of fun. All these dates have been, it's been amazing! And it's been so great to be going on dates!
The date with Brett last weekend deserves a whole entry to itself, but in a nutshell...so he had an extra ticket to the Young Ambassadors show, and invited me, and then wanted to make it an official date, so we went out to dinner before hand, to Zupa's (YUM). So then we went to the show, and then we just drove around and listened to music like Wicked, Lion King, Hairspray, etc., and just jammed out singing to them. He has a really great voice, and I just like to sing, so it was so much fun! We ended up driving out to Utah Lake and we blasted music in his car while we hung out on the rocks and just sang and sang. It was cold, but it was a lot of fun! We also ended up driving up around the temple, and then also ended up at a look-out point, which I thought was funny. Although by then, I was feeling so comfortable with him, and had had such a great time, that I probably would have let him do whatever. I mean, like hold my hand, or even kiss me, if he had really wanted to or tried. I kept having this urge while he was driving around to scratch/rub/tickle his neck. I never did, and now I'm kind of glad.
We eventually ended up back at my apartment complex, and sat in the car for a long time and just kept talking and had some music on. He told me about another sister missionary from the mission (after I went home) that he was really good friends with and interested in, and she came down last month and they kind of dated, basically, over the weekend she was here from BYU-I. He was going up there the next day and wanted to talk to her about things, cuz another elder (Martinez), who had been open about wanting to date her when he got home, was going to come home the next Wed. (this last Wed.), and Brett wanted to clear the slate with her, basically, for when Elder Martins came home. It's complicated, but anyway. So he told me all this and asked me for advice, and we talked about the situation a lot.
We also ended up talking a lot about me (well, mostly he did). He told me a lot of really nice things and really boosted my confidence, especially with guys. He said that in one way he could not understand why I wasn't going on dates every night, and in another way, he could understand why I wasn't, because I'm just so..whatever (great, etc.), that it's intimidating or whatnot. He went more into detail and we talked about it, and about girls that are so amazing but don't get married, yada yada, and anyway.. I told him that that really meant a lot because recently I had gone through a time that I just really hadn't felt datable, cuz I never get asked out, and I don't feel attractive, etc. I told him never to be afraid to ask a girl out, that we are all just as terrified and self-conscious or what not, and all like to feel attractive and datable. He ended up telling me, indirectly, saying it without really saying it, that I am the kind of girl that his mom told him to spend time with, and look for, who he feels so comfortable with, etc. He told me, toward the end of the night, that I just make him want to be so much better, that when he's around me, he just wants to be better. I didn't really know how to respond, so I just kind of chuckled and said, "Just be yourself," and he said no, that his self wasn't good enough.
He said other things, really nice things... oh, he told me that I am a cute girl, who is fun, .... I can't remember the other descriptions he said, I think because I got caught up on the "cute girl" part. I am so self-conscious and not confident about my physical attractiveness, that it means SO much to me if any guy ever calls me cute or pretty or anything like that. He is so sweet.
Oh, we also ended up talking about mission crushes, and he told me he had one on me (which I basically knew, from on the mission), and I told him that I may or may not have had one on him...just to be fair. :)
But then end of the night, at about 2:30 am, after spending about 8 hours together, and after all the amazing things he'd said to me, and the subtle, but not-so-subtle things he said, I felt like if he thought I would say yes, he might ask me to marry him. Maybe not, but it was feeling a bit that way. But also by the end of the night, he still never even really made physical contact. I was kind of surprised, and a little bummed, cuz I was feeling so comfortable, and probably would have liked it.
It was such a fun date though, because I'm so comfortable with him, and he is with me, so it's so nice to feel that way, and not feel like I need to impress anyone, that I can just be myself. Oh, amidst all our mega-jam singing, he complimented me on my voice, after telling me to just sing out (like as a soloist), and I told him that I'm not really a soloist, and that I don't really think my voice is that great. That I'm self-conscious of my singing voice. He told me then, multiple times after that, that I have a really pretty voice, or complimented me on specific parts of songs when I would harmonize really well, or what not. He said my voice kind of matches Elphaba's on the Wicked soundtrack (he used a certain word that I can't think of, but something like my tone). That was cool to hear, coming from him.
Anyway, a fun date, and he is such a great guy. My one thing is that I've never been way physically attracted to him, but by the end of the date, I definitely wasn't ruling anything out happening between us. If he were to ask me out again, I would certainly say yes. But he hasn't done anything else yet, and I think that we'll probably never be more than good friends, which is why it's probably a good thing I didn't rub his neck, or that he didn't kiss me. I just am not really attracted to him like that, which is kind of a bummer, because he would be so so good to me.
Anyway, I really have to go to bed now, I can't believe I'm still up. It's 11:30 pm, and I wanted to try to get up early, maybe even around 5 or 6. We'll see.
I'm really glad I wrote about this though, I feel good. Goodnight!
Last couple things--I am interested in a guy named Isaac in our ward. Very few people know about this, in fact, only Elise. I will try to fill in on him more soon.
Highlight of this weekend was also that Kayla was gone since Friday night til just tonight. I know that's probably terrible to say, but it's true. It was so nice to just have Alisha and I here. I really like being here with her, we get along really well. And together we cleaned pretty much our whole apt last night, it was so great! :)
But I'm moving out in less than a month, so I just have to endure my sweet roommate, Kayla, til then...:)
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